Unequally Yoked

I Have just finished 4 days in the hospital for what they called, Congestive heart failure.  Also, this Sun. I celebrate 80 years on earth.

My position reminds me of Psalm 90:9-12

Psa 90:9 For all our days are passed away in thy wrath: we bring our years to an end as a tale that is told.

Psa 90:10 The days of our years are threescore years and ten, or even by reason of strength fourscore years (80 years); yet is their pride but labor and sorrow; for it is soon gone, and we fly away.

Psa 90:11 Who knows the power of thine anger, and thy wrath according to the fear that is due unto thee?

Psa 90:12 So teach us to number our days, that we may get us a heart of wisdom.

I have run the race and now put me up wet.

Psalm 90:12 is my mantra in the reading last few days.

      Psa 90:12 So teach us to number our days, so that we may bring a heart of wisdom.

I have learned very clearly:

“God is in Control and has my Best Interest at Heart”.  The mantra has carried me all these years.

Let us all focus our thinking as men of Christ and pursue the mind of Christ. All else is folly.


Question: Is your children dating and then marrying non-believers-wrong?

We should always take the Word of God seriously. If we believe God, Christ and the Word is an accurate letter from God, then our only response is to obey. To obey is to believe.

I was asked years ago by a young believer, “I don’t always feel like I love God. How do I know I love God?” He was saying he didn’t always feel emotional about God.

As long as I have lived, the concept of love was always expressed as an emotion. Yes, love has an emotional component but a majority is found, understood, expressed in your personal discipline of service.

Love is one person serving another without an agenda. Yes, I experience emotion in a relationship but I do not trust my emotions to guide my behavior. I love God as shown in John 14:21 “He who has My commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves Me. And he who loves Me shall be loved by My Father, and I will love him and will reveal Myself to him”.

My love of God is an act of the will. My obedience demonstrates my love for God.

Unequal yoking:

And that brings us to the commandment

2Co 6:14 “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers; for what fellowship does righteousness have with lawlessness? And what partnership does light have with darkness?”

Dr John MacArthur’s notes.

“Unequally yoked is an illustration taken from the OT. By this analogy Paul was teaching that it is not right to join together in common spiritual enterprise with those who are not of the same nature (unbelievers). It is impossible under such an arrangement for things to be done to God’s glory with unbelievers.”

Marriage is a spiritual enterprise.

There is a clear application to this commandment. A Christian should not marry at non-Christian. 1 Corinthians discusses the disposition of a mixed faith marriage but I have always thought Paul was speaking to couples where one of the mates converted to Christ after the marriage and then were unequally yoked. This would be the state in the early Church.

Upon analysis, I concluded the only relationship that could be analyzed as Biblical yoking is Marriage. If I am right, a believer should not marry a non-believer.

It was explained to me years ago that the uniqueness of Biblical example of yoking is that once you are in it, you could not get out of it. The master had to let you out. The only relationship I can think that fits that explanation is marriage.

That doesn’t mean don’t mix marriages with denominations or races or others, it means believers are not to marry non-believers. It is a very clear command but disobeyed within the believing community. This goes for the son or the daughter.

Let me repeat, John MacArthur said… “Paul was teaching that it is not right to join together in common spiritual enterprise with those who are not of the same nature (unbelievers). It is impossible under such an arrangement for things to be done to God’s glory with unbelievers.”

I cannot think of a more “spiritual enterprise” than that of marriage. I had several mixed faith professional relationships but always had an escape route. Short of death I don’t know one for marriage.

Unequal yoking is not to be discussed at the time of the engagement but in the dating growing up phase of life.

Our application with my kids may appear too strict but we said to our children don’t marry a non-Christian.  We agree with MacArthur, “It is impossible under such an arrangement for things to be done to God’s glory with unbelievers.”

My daughter asked if she could date a non-Christian and my answer was yes, but I noted to her that we marry who we date and therefore, it is probably a good practice to only date believers.

We also told her that if you decide to break the principle of this Command and decide to marry a nonbeliever, we will not bless the marriage or fund it or attend it. We cannot support flagrant disobedience to the principle of the command.

Now this stand was discussed and agreed to by the Mom (wife) before it was reviewed with the daughter or the son. Your response to their marriage should be understood by the spouse in advance.”

The application is

  1. Discuss your thinking on the commands as they pertain to your kids with your wife.
  2. Discuss your position with the kids on the commands that affect them in advance.
  3. You and your wife periodically review, discuss and think through the commands of the Bible.

This type discussion with the mate is required in developing CWV for all commands and writings of the scripture.

PS: I am glad to report she married a good Christian man.

Gaining a CWV is critical for your life. This list is just a cut at issues and items you must think out for your CWV. Most men I meet have a hybrid World View. Some culture and some my emotion and some the Bible.

Some areas you need to get a clear view from the scripture for your CWV are– This list is from an earlier Blog on CWV.

  1. My Purpose in Life
  2. Authority and accuracy of the Word
  3. Family
    • My marriage
    • Sexual relation to spouse
    • Money
    • Your children
    • Respecting their Mom/Dad
    • Honoring your Parents
  4. Learning and thinking
  5. Dating and then marrying non-believers-you and your children
  6. Moral discipline of brothers and members of the family
  7. Habits
  8. My dealing with sexual deviants or the overall moral decay of my society.
  9. How to serve my boss
  10. My view and my obedience to authority in my life, i.e.
    • the Word,
    • the President,
    • the Governor,
    • the Police,
    • the Church leadership,
    • the Father,
    • the Mother,
    • the Spouse,
    • the driving laws,
    • etc.
  11. Fearing God, parts 1 and 2
  12. My “generosity-giving”
  13. The church*
  14. Forgiveness*
  15. My contentment with my life and where God has me
  16. My motivation
  17. My Legacy with the Kids
  18. What is Success
  19. View of death and life after
  20. My good works
  21. My Contending-Contend*
  22. My Theology
  23. My Hope
  24. Why do I work
  25. Legal action with a brother
  26. Death*

This is a life time journey and some of your thinking and application may be altered with time. But be in the pursuit.

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